Alucard is Dracula backwards and you're fucking draining me

from HITBOX by hitbox

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lyrics

Fuck
I dont't wanna think
I don't wanna leave my bed
I just wanna play dead
Stuck in a rut again, it's my fault, it always is.

Don't wash my hair
Don't know who to blame, maybe it's just me
I'm making progress and then backslide takes me back to fucking

Been here before, been here my whole life
Maybe it's just me
Pick it up, pick it up, straighten up your back young man
Let go of me!

No turning back, now I know, fuck
Memories all cursed
Memories of how you treated everyone you couldn't groom

And I want it back
Every minute I spent worried about looking bad in the eyes of that freak
Fuck you and the power trips - household politics
Couldn't take the fucking torture

I want it back
Can't get it back
Stop looking back
I can't move on if I can't accept the finality
But it doesn't work
Why do I still hurt?
Did I deserve to burn?

I was raised by a fucking predator
Why did God decide we fucking need this pain
I was spared the worst of it but I'm still feelng broken. Defeated.
But I can't dwell. I can't help.
Fuck it.

Cant ignore the swirling vortex swallowing my mind if I try screaming fuck it fuck you it won't make it stop or make it fake.
I'm reeling and not healing and I'm not sure I can take it but I'll try oh God I'll try oh God I'll try oh God I'll try...

credits

from HITBOX, released April 23, 2022

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